I feel like a failure

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You may have noticed that my Blogtober posts suddenly ended and my last post was on day 16. Well, despite thinking I was ahead of the game with being organised and my planning, life got in the way; the week before I literally had no time to focus on my writing and get my posts edited and scheduled in time. I was a week and a half ahead of myself but it still wasn’t enough. I feel like a failure, but I’m trying to see the positives too.

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the reasons Why I didn’t complete Blogtober

There are many reasons why I didn’t complete the challenge, but quite simply it was down to lack of time and how hectic my life was during September and October. Blogtober was bad timing, you could say.

Normally I spend time on my blog in the evenings after work, but my day job is extremely busy at the moment – I was +16 hours in my flexi at one point. After working at a computer all day, the last thing I wanted to do was spend more time on my laptop. It also gets harder to manage my pain, especially when I’m more tired after a busy and challenging day.

I also like to get up early before work and spend time on my blog, but I’ve been far too tired to do that. Plus the dark mornings are not very inspiring and it is so much harder to get up before the alarm goes off. In summer I was up at 5am – but now I’m barely up before 6am; that extra hour can make such a huge difference.

The weekends are also a very productive time for me and my blog, but again, I’ve had very little time to myself. I’ve been on a Hen Do, a Stag Do, had a wedding to go to, been to visit my mum and dad every weekend to support them as much as I can while my dad has his treatment.

And day-to-day chores have just got in the way too – shopping, cooking, cleaning, walking my dogs etc etc.

In the end the pressure of finding the time, and achieving my goal for the sake of it got too much, and I knew I wouldn’t enjoy finishing my Blogtober posts. It would become a chore, and I didn’t want that for my blog as I knew it wouldn’t be enjoyable.

There's no such thing s failure, only feedback quote

focusing on the positives

No matter how I look at it, I didn’t achieve my goal of completing this year’s Blogtober by publishing a posts every day in October. Fact. It didn’t happen. I’m honestly really gutted. I hate failing things and not achieving what I set out to do. It kinda leaves a sour feeling in your mouth, and a feeling of just wanting to give up (on my blog) altogether.

This isn’t going to happen, so I’m trying to change this negative thinking and seek out the positives instead. Surprisingly, I’ve come up with a lot more than I thought I would:

  • The pressure was immediately taken way from me – I felt a sense of relief.
  • I focused on the values of my blog work – not doing something for the sake of it when I knew it wouldn’t be enjoyable.
  • I still managed to publish 16 posts in 16 days – that is still an achievement!
  • I’m creating the breathing space I need to plan my next few blog posts – I hadn’t scheduled my November posts so now I have the time to do that.
  • More people read my Blogtober posts than I thought they would – and the goal of increasing my daily views was achieved.
  • I have some prompts ready to use in future – it was hard coming up with 31 ideas.
  • I have some ‘me time’ now which is well needed at the moment – now I can focus on my own wellbeing a little more.
  • I’ve learned that as much as I think I’m good at being organised, I can still improve – we are constantly learning and growing in life.

Who knows if I’ll attempt this challenge again. But if I do I have learned ways to improve for next time.

But most importantly, I have learned that I am not a failure.

Share your thoughts

Did you take part in Blogtober? Did you complete the challenge? What have you learned for next time?


 

 

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11 thoughts on “I feel like a failure

  1. Sassy says:

    You’re not a Phalia, and in writing this post and being honest you are helping others who may not have completed it either, letting them know they are not alone and it’s okay to finish something halfway through a task if it preserves your physical and mental health.
    Sassy xxx

  2. hazel jackson says:

    Don’t feel like it was a failure at all. I’ve seen very few people post every day and what you did achieve was great. Blogging should be fun not a chore. I’ve only managed it as I wrote and scheduled all my posts prior to 1 October. I’m finding it tough finding the time to promote them all though.

    Be proud of what you’ve done and most of all enjoy your blog when you want to do it 🙂

    • Alice says:

      Enjoying my blog is my main goal so I think I did the right thing. It’s amazing how much time you need to spend on promotion even when you’ve scheduled posts. Well done for getting ahead x

  3. Rachael Stray says:

    You have a tonne on your plate so well done on getting so far with the Blogtober challenge I couldn’t do it. Would you try again next year? You could ask in advance for some guest posts to pad it out for you which would take some of the pressure off for you. 31 days of blogs is a heck of a lot! I’m really proud of you.

    • Alice says:

      Thank you so much ☺️ And thank you for your daily comments. That’s a good idea. Maybe a guest list a week would really help. I had one planned but it wasn’t enough. I might try it next year but need to get organised in June I think ha ha x

  4. Josy A says:

    You should NOT feel like a failure! Blooming ‘eck it sounds like you have more than enough on your plate!

    I like the sound of the positives! I mean, now you have a pile of really good ideas to blog about when you have time. Rushing them to get everything out each day sounds like more stress than it’s worth when you’re that busy!!

    • Alice says:

      Thanks Nicola 😃 I think I’ll do challenges in the future but need plenty of time to get ahead with my schedule. A week just wasn’t long enough x

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